Saturday, May 28, 2011

Book Review - Confessions of a Cheating Man by RAW - also Our Love Is Not What It Used to Be & You Deserve a Better Man

Confessions of a Cheating Man
Confessions of a Cheating Man by RAW
Paperback, 152 pages
Published June 1st 2008 by Baby Daddy Publishing
Source: Purchased this autographed book from RAW
Oosa Book Club 13 week challenge, book 7 of 13

About The Book:

The most talked about, the most anticipated biography to hit the streets!!! The story of a man who lost his wife and destroyed his family, due to his infidelity. The story of a man who thought the grass was greener on the other side... The story of a man who realized his sickness, when it was too late!!!


The Cheatologist is one who studies and identifies with the underlining causes and effect of lies, betrayal and cheating in relationships...and seeks to find solutions within the issues that propels one to cheat. 

The Cheatologist has been studying and researching the cheating epidemic that has plagued our community for years now, and honestly seeks to give advice on how to combat the evil results of its effect. 


It was so hard for me, at one point, to stop a behavior that I kept indulging in recklessly. I always wondered why I kept running the streets looking for what I already had at home. But the intensity in my arousal, along with my weak resistance to flesh, kept encouraging me to make irrational choices. The ill choices I made became a bigger problem for me...they became an addiction that kept me, insanely, attached to activities beyond my marriage.

I was once so loving and kind to my wife. However, my attitude became brutally disrespectful when she continued to question my misplaced loyalties. And, despite the increasing negative impact that my actions had on my family, I continued to engage in persistent and escalating patterns of sexual behavior that had me taking money from home and spending it on women in the street. I wondered, till this day, in the presence of shame, fear and exploitation, why did my wife still love me and why did she endure this humiliation for so long? But I realized that shouldn't be the question; it should be why do we hurt our wives like this and expect them to stay?

This is my story, my drama, my confessions.

Contact RAW at:

My Review:

First of all, I have to give a lot of credit to RAW for writing this book.  Yes, cheating on a spouse is wrong, but RAW is telling us his story.  He is showing how he cheated on his wife and what resulted from his cheating.  He is not glorifying his cheating.  He is showing us that he had a problem and that if you cheat on your spouse, there is no turning back.

In the book you will see that RAW thought that as long as he took care of things at home, it was okay to go out and have a little fun on the side.   He thought this because his wife never questioned what he was doing.  He did think about what he was doing and knew it was wrong, but he could not get himself to stop. You will also be able to read a letter from his wife to him expressing her feelings.  One little mistake, something he forgot, would change everything.  He had an addiction though that he just couldn't get over.

About 2 a.m., I jumped up and made love to my wife till about 5:30 a.m.   She told me how much she loved me.  She actually cried and said "you don't know how much I love you."  The truth is, I did know how much she loved me.  But I couldn't stop this desire to want to lay my head on a new pillow; this desire to hear someone else tell me how good my sex was. This was my get high...thinking about De'osha, my next victim.  And the serial cheater is about to strike again. (p108)

RAW really writes from his heart on a very relevant issue--cheating.  He also states in the book how after a while, his wife stopped complimenting him and stopped showing how much she loved him, he looked for love from other women.  I think husbands and wives have gotten too caught up in what is going on in their lives, and we forget sometimes to just slow down and make it a point to put some time into keeping our marriage alive.  It becomes habit sometimes to just do the same things that we are used to and not make time for things like dates with our spouse or showing them how much we really do love them.  Sometimes we need to go out of our comfort zone and do what we need to in order to keep that spark alive, even if that means we have to figure how to spend more time together or even schedule a date.

I recommend Confessions of a Cheating Man by RAW.  He gives you a real look into what happened to his marriage after he cheated on his wife so many times.  Go to his website and listen to the music that plays.  That music that he has playing really makes me sad for him and what happened to his life.  He also sent me the "Fake Ricky Rozay at it again" You Tube video as well as an interview that he did (not the one I posted here).  He regrets what he did and has changed to become a better person.


He also sent me Our Love Is Not What It Used To Be "Something From Our Past Won't Let Us Last." by Raw "The Cheatologist"  and You Deserve a Better Man "Can a cheating man still be a good man?"  

RAW writes  to his wife about his thoughts. Failure to communicate is a big issue that can really put a strain on a marriage.  He writes to his wife about how he had to beg for her attention.  If she would have just given him some attention, he may not have felt the desire to seek out pleasure in other women.  

"The truth is, you had more of an expectation of the man that you wanted me to be but you lost out on not accepting me for the man I was." p.27
He wanted sex and his wife just blew him off.  Marriage works both ways,  you can't expect to stay close and have a great marriage if one person is not willing to give in a little.  

Again, I am not saying cheating is the best way to deal with this, but RAW is human and has needs.  He went out and got them met by whoever would fulfill them.  He wanted it to be his wife, but it just didn't happen how he had hoped. 

I am looking forward to reading more books by RAW!

My rating
5/5 diamonds
Highly Recommend!

How to Contact RAW:

Disclaimer: I was not compensated for my review. My thoughts on this book were in no way influenced by the author or publicist. They are my personal reflections based solely on MY experience while reading this novel.

 © 2011, Cheryl of Black Diamond's Book Reviews. All Rights Reserved. If you reading this on a site other than, Black Diamond's Book ReviewsUrban Image Magazine, or Cheryl's feed, be aware that this post has been stolen and is used without permission.


  1. Damz!! girl, you making my book list go pass the line, I'm sneaking books in like i use to sneak in shoes. lol. This one sounds like a goodie book.

  2. This sounds like a good read from a male's POV. I'm curious...did his wife stay? and has he stopped cheating?

  3. @Sidne - LOL! Yeah, you need a Kindle, the books are easier to sneak in!

    @Staci - Yes he stopped cheating and his wife didn't stay. That is why he wrote the book, to show others that cheating will make you lose your family and it's not worth it.